The achievement...of a lifetime.

Today, I conquered Mt. Nostalgia.

What is Mt. Nostalgia, you ask? Well, it is the aptly named teetering towering mountain of crap accumulated from various move-outs (college, DC, Korea) that made its large and in charge presence known to anyone foolish enough to set foot in my room.

When my mom went in my room yesterday, she screamed. Literally - screamed.

You see, Mt. Nostalgia was growing so tall, mostly from debris accumulation (ie. I kept throwing stuff on it) that parts of the exterior were starting to sheer off in giant erosive landslides. Fearing yet another disastrous avalanche, this afternoon I decided that it was time to conquer the beast.

Now, most people (I'm talking about women here - when's the last time you saw a man sorting anything?), when faced with the task of sorting through items of sentimental value, will get about a quarter of the way into the sorting process only to get swept up in the sweet, sweet memories of years and times gone by.

This reminiscing is DISASTROUS to the sorting process and will not only lead to a decrease in sorting efficiency, an increase in time spent, but ultimately it could derail the sorting process altogether, because she decides that 'memories are too precious to just throw away' so back in the closet go the wedding programs, the heartfelt cards from people she hasn't talked to in 21 years and the stub from the first movie a boy took her to.

I, however, think these women are crazy.

With a few exceptions, I take ruthless pleasure in discarding mementos of my past. Now, please - don't get me wrong. If you have been one of the people who sent me a card or made me a handmade woven potholder featuring a picture of you and me holding hands, I want to say that I do, indeed, treasure these artifacts. I sincerely do. Thank you so much for giving them to me, and when I read them or gazed upon them I truly felt loved, and they may have even brought a tear to my eye. And I'm sure I re-experienced that emotion today when I re-read or re-gazed upon your gift right before I re-cycled it with the rest of the paper products in my closet.

Its just that I hate - I HATE - being weighed down by things. I like my possessions to constantly be whittled down so that if I needed to flee the country in 24 hours, I could. Call me crazy, but this thought enters my mind many times as I drift off to sleep: "Could I pack everything I own into 3 suitcases?" "What would I leave behind?" "Did I leave my hair straightener on?" "Do I even need a hair straightener?" "What if I had to leave but it was still hot?"

So that's why I throw your stuff away. I'm really sorry. I don't throw everything away - I usually keep one card or note (the most poignant and touching, of course) from each of my friends as to have physical proof of your love for me. These help on the lonely days.

So, in conclusion, you guys are the best. And please don't refrain from telling me how you truly feel about me in card or letter form. I promise I will treasure your words, just as long as they're more touching and/or poignant than the other card I have from you, which will be dis"card"ed immediately upon receiving the new one.

Saranghaeyo~ <3 <3 <3

PS. I included a picture because a couple great bloggers once told me that my blogs tend to have a lot of "words" and that people tend to enjoy blogs with pictures as to keep their visual interest...so I hope you enjoy my selection.

PPS. I think writing satire is quite possibly my favorite thing to do...